Friday, July 10, 2009

Learn to blame yourself first...

Please make sure that you read the whole post, cause at the end is the most crucial part you need to learn.

When in a conflict and in an argument dont forget to stop and admit your mistakes. Even if you think it's not your fault, i'm sure there would be something you can do to prevent the conflict from happening.

You called a friend and asked him whether he finished his work for a club. He says he haven't finished. Then, naturally, you would ask why and the discussion may get heated. Regardless, you should stop before things get bad and discuss a solution. After you reached a solution with him, think back what YOU can do to prevent it in the first place. Yes, it's his fault for not finishing, but that does not mean you should leave everything to him and 'lepas tangan', you're a team.

Maybe if you always follow-up the work with that friend of yours, maybe he would have more initiative, also your friend would also know that you are also doing your part of the work. You did not manage your team well enough. Maybe if you clarify how important it is to complete the work before the deadline than your friend would manage his time in a better way. Maybe you forgot to consider holiday's effect, it's hard when semester break to work with your team who are scattered all over Malaysia.

There are three reasons learning to blame yourself first is good...

Learning to control Ego
Lot of people in Mlaysia are egoistic. They see people who are questioning their work as people who want to take their position, damage their stature in society and what not. But acually, we just wan to do our job well, and that depends oo the work done by these egoistical people. It's just the culture here. To prevent you from becoming these kind of people, blame yourself first. And by doing you wont see yourself as high and might, and you would not get cocky.

Practise Patience and Humility.
Being patient and humble is a very good thing, so in a conflict and when you're getting angry, stop and find solution. Don't avoid the conflict, solve it. People grow when conflicts are solved.
When you learn not to be cocky, you learn to become humble. And when your humble, people are more comfortable to share opinions with you and wrk better with you.

See that are always ways you can do better..
Like I said, when your humble, people are more comfortable to share opinions with you and wrk better with you. You will experience and accelerated growth of experience and knowledge. And you are aready on the track to self-actualization. Self-actualization is the ONLY goal you should have in life.


learn to cnrtol ego, and accept that things mitght be wrong or can improve

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